I am lucky enough to have a big family with dozens of cousins, lots of aunts and uncles and loving parents. My Aunt Hope – who is closer in age to me than she is to her brother (my dad) – has been a sister figure in my life; she shares advice just right for my sisters and me. I remember when Hope once told me that she loved her husband more than she loved her kids. At the time – I wasn’t yet married or a mother – the comment seemed a little harsh. Geez, I thought, why you gotta break it down like that?!
Fast forward lots of years and I now see the wisdom – and the nuance – of Hope’s words. Parents are the leaders of the family, and if that relationship falls apart the family might crumble, too. By loving my husband, I am loving my kids. By showing my husband how much I love him, I am teaching my kids how to love their future spouses. It is a lovely cycle, really!
I often wonder how single parents do it – day in, day out without the support and back-up of another adult. I am grateful I don’t have to carry the burden on my own as I wonder how I’d manage without Chris’s strength. To the parents doing it solo I say “thank you and keep it up!” You are living the definition of selflessness.
Marriage is work, but for me it isn’t drudgery. I enjoy being married to Chris. I love it, actually! Chris is a good man, a wonderful father, and a fabulous husband. He works hard to provide for the family we created. Even on the weekends, when he should be relaxing, we work together to keep the kids entertained and engaged. Little Ben – who (at 5 weeks old) is dependent on me for just about everything – already enjoys quiet snuggles with his big dad.
Chris is showing our sons how to be a strong father. He is teaching them how to be a loving husband. Their future wives and children are already lucky!
Chris is setting an example for Evie and Vivian, too. His daily actions teach our girls what kind of person they should someday marry. I hope they find someone who treats them with the same kindness and respect Chris shows me every day.
Hope’s words stick with me to this day as the love I have for Chris continues to grow. I know I can always do a better job showing Chris just how much I love him. I want him to always know just how happy he makes me. Once I emerge from the fog of new motherhood I will make a bigger effort. He is the love of my life, the man of my dreams!
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